A Strange Void

There is this bizarre void in my heart that started after Chase left the first time he visited me.  That initial void was very small, and quite easy to ignore.  After all, while we had been talking on and off for five or six months, and quite steadily for the last two of those months, that week after Thanksgiving was the first time we had met face-to-face.  That week was amazing, spending actual time in the presence of the man who had captured my interest, who had such similar likes and hobbies and interests.

The second time, I was the one who did the leaving, and that tiny void grew.  It was harder to ignore once I had arrived home and had nothing to think about but the fact we were once again apart.  We spent a fantastic week doing so much around Minneapolis and gaming and going out to eat, and the feelings grew a bit more.

This third time was once again Chase leaving Lincoln a day ahead of schedule, which was heartbreaking for me.  And the void from his absence is now unable to be ignored.  The interest that I feared would fade hasn't, and instead of being terrified, I am trying to hard to ignore it for now.  I really am content with simply being Chase's girlfriend and enjoying the talks we have and the time we can spend together every few months.

I have no idea what the future holds, but I do know that at this moment, I want to be with Chase.  Not married, but content with calling him my boyfriend, with him calling me his girlfriend, knowing that there is a mutual interest in each other and that he makes me smile and feel beautiful, and that I make him feel important and worthy.

tl:dr - I miss Chase.  :)